Starting to get nervous about this all...

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Probably cause u are average height or even above in some places looking at this insane procedure that will hardly change anything for people at the average or above average thereshold.(other than self-perception)

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I feel the exact same way.  What keeps me going is that almost every person says they are happy they did it and cannot imagine being shorter.

However you are not that short.  In all honesty this procedure is questionable for you at your height.  Not trying to discourage you but 5'8.5 is not a bad height.  Im a bit over 5'7.  If I was your height id call it a day and not get the surgery.

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My Surgery is scheduled next year, but I am getting quite nervous about this all.

I will still go through with it, but I get moments where I go from pure conviction to...

What the hell am I doing? Dropping so much money in a global recession, doing this in pure secret away from my family, going through the inevitable pain and uncertainty that may follow.

But then I realise that, my life will change, dramatically after this. I will finally be able to take one big real step towards settling down and being happy and being with a future soulmate. It's sad we're biological creatures and it's sad...that this stuff matters.

It just feels draining to be working overtime/other jobs just to save up for this, only to then take out five months doing it.

Don't listen to the other comments. You will feel better at a better height. My only suggestion is try to get into a few shows during your time off to keep your mind busy. Or learn hacking or some now hobby at the computer. What's the point of buying time if you can't enjoy it lol? @overandover. Get the surgery and free your mind the mental space it needs to grow and become stronger in other areas of your life. Also you're working overtime, that's great, take away the surgery and where does your motivation lie? Thinking about height neurosis? Get the surgery and where does your motivation lie? Getting stronger in other aspects of you life and becoming more fulfilled.