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Posted on Nov 9, 2014, 12:43 am
#1

Are you naturally shorter than your father or mother? If so, has this contributed significantly to your height neurosis?

Personally, I am somewhere around 3-3.5inches (7 to 9 CM) shorter than my father, which led to me frequently feeling as though I wasn't as much of as a man as him while growing up. I no longer feel that height determines manliness, as stupid of a concept as that even is, but, being shorter, I often feel inadequate, and as though I didn't meet my expectations of myself as an adult, even though everyone in my circle of family and friends has always told me that my height it fine, even though I am the shortest male, and that I was/am a wonderful person and so on.

Furthermore, I always felt too submissive around my father and taller male relatives, and, in my late teens, was felt really awkward about not ever "measuring up" to them, meaning that, when I failed to achieve as much in an area as they had at a given age, I felt inferior, both physically and mentally. I once felt that I could never become the man, inspiration, and leader my father was to me and others with a noticeably shorter height.

I also witnessed most of my friends growing taller than their fathers while I remained much shorter than mine. This, too, contributed to my feeling of inadequacy and being "different". I can definitely say that the height difference was a big factor in my development of height neurosis and self-confidence issues during my early years.


Years have passed, and I've since conquered the self-confidence issues and am very happy with the direction my adult life is taking. I do realize that my feelings were irrational and I have come a long way in becoming the person I dream of being. My father and I enjoy a very healthy relationship. I do not feel that my height is holding me back much, if at all, but my height neurosis still remains and I still beat myself up about height and get jealous of other people who are taller, although I don't act on those feelings besides participating in this forum and contemplating LL. I did go to a psychologist and they did nothing to get rid of the height neurosis. They confirmed that I am not depressed, and I am otherwise quite mentally healthy and stable. I just happen to have strong height dysphoria that I'm absolutely sick and tired of.

Can any of you relate? How did your own height differences compared to family members affect you mentally?

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Posted on Nov 9, 2014, 12:43 am
#2

Are you naturally shorter than your father or mother? If so, has this contributed significantly to your height neurosis?

Personally, I am somewhere around 3-3.5inches (7 to 9 CM) shorter than my father, which led to me frequently feeling as though I wasn't as much of as a man as him while growing up. I no longer feel that height determines manliness, as stupid of a concept as that even is, but, being shorter, I often feel inadequate, and as though I didn't meet my expectations of myself as an adult, even though everyone in my circle of family and friends has always told me that my height it fine, even though I am the shortest male, and that I was/am a wonderful person and so on.

Furthermore, I always felt too submissive around my father and taller male relatives, and, in my late teens, was felt really awkward about not ever "measuring up" to them, meaning that, when I failed to achieve as much in an area as they had at a given age, I felt inferior, both physically and mentally. I once felt that I could never become the man, inspiration, and leader my father was to me and others with a noticeably shorter height.

I also witnessed most of my friends growing taller than their fathers while I remained much shorter than mine. This, too, contributed to my feeling of inadequacy and being "different". I can definitely say that the height difference was a big factor in my development of height neurosis and self-confidence issues during my early years.


Years have passed, and I've since conquered the self-confidence issues and am very happy with the direction my adult life is taking. I do realize that my feelings were irrational and I have come a long way in becoming the person I dream of being. My father and I enjoy a very healthy relationship. I do not feel that my height is holding me back much, if at all, but my height neurosis still remains and I still beat myself up about height and get jealous of other people who are taller, although I don't act on those feelings besides participating in this forum and contemplating LL. I did go to a psychologist and they did nothing to get rid of the height neurosis. They confirmed that I am not depressed, and I am otherwise quite mentally healthy and stable. I just happen to have strong height dysphoria that I'm absolutely sick and tired of.

Can any of you relate? How did your own height differences compared to family members affect you mentally?

Like (0)
Posted on Nov 9, 2014, 7:06 am
#3

Thank you very much for sharing your view of the situation. Yes I'm 179CM, but that's only 2CM taller than you are. If I am mentally unstable just for considering LL, then perhaps by that logic you are too. Human happiness is not a logical behavior, unfortunately. I always dreamt  of being tall, and  I fully expected to be as well, since my father is so tall.

I do try to overcompensate for my height, and I'm aware of it and trying to get rid of this irrational behavior. I often perceive that people are nicer and more willing to listen to the taller guys, but I use a few techniques to overcome this, such as being more outgoing and sociable and making extra effort to dress and act nicely. Height discrimination is really not enough of an issue to warrant LL. There is no real discrimination at 179CM.

But even in realizing this, I still want to be taller to match mental image of myself. This is probably the real reason I want to undergo the procedure. Even though I've realized the illogical and irrational nature of my height neurosis, it won't go away. The only explanation for it that makes sense to me is that I want to improve myself to match my dream version of myself, which I feel I shouldn've been all along.

This thread isn't made to justify my desire for LL either. I wrote about my experience to show how being shorter than my father impacted me psychologically as I finished physical development.


Thank you very much for your input though. I do really appreciate it.

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Posted on Nov 9, 2014, 7:06 am
#4

Thank you very much for sharing your view of the situation. Yes I'm 179CM, but that's only 2CM taller than you are. If I am mentally unstable just for considering LL, then perhaps by that logic you are too. Human happiness is not a logical behavior, unfortunately. I always dreamt  of being tall, and  I fully expected to be as well, since my father is so tall.

I do try to overcompensate for my height, and I'm aware of it and trying to get rid of this irrational behavior. I often perceive that people are nicer and more willing to listen to the taller guys, but I use a few techniques to overcome this, such as being more outgoing and sociable and making extra effort to dress and act nicely. Height discrimination is really not enough of an issue to warrant LL. There is no real discrimination at 179CM.

But even in realizing this, I still want to be taller to match mental image of myself. This is probably the real reason I want to undergo the procedure. Even though I've realized the illogical and irrational nature of my height neurosis, it won't go away. The only explanation for it that makes sense to me is that I want to improve myself to match my dream version of myself, which I feel I shouldn've been all along.

This thread isn't made to justify my desire for LL either. I wrote about my experience to show how being shorter than my father impacted me psychologically as I finished physical development.


Thank you very much for your input though. I do really appreciate it.

Like (0)
Posted on Nov 9, 2014, 10:42 pm
#5

Thanks for your post Uppland. Stockholm is definitely a beautiful city indeed, especially in the evening!

I don't think that we experience any real discrimination at 179CM though. I just feel so far from the height I dreamed of being and often feel small, kind of like what you stated.

Have you talked with your friends or family about your feelings? I eventually did so after years of keeping it in and it proved very therapeutic, morsoe than the dumb psychologist I saw once.

This forum is also a great place to talk about these kinds of feelings relating to height. You're right, sometimes it feels great to get pent up frustrations off your chest and share them with others.

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Posted on Nov 9, 2014, 10:42 pm
#6

Thanks for your post Uppland. Stockholm is definitely a beautiful city indeed, especially in the evening!

I don't think that we experience any real discrimination at 179CM though. I just feel so far from the height I dreamed of being and often feel small, kind of like what you stated.

Have you talked with your friends or family about your feelings? I eventually did so after years of keeping it in and it proved very therapeutic, morsoe than the dumb psychologist I saw once.

This forum is also a great place to talk about these kinds of feelings relating to height. You're right, sometimes it feels great to get pent up frustrations off your chest and share them with others.

Like (0)
Posted on Nov 14, 2014, 7:42 pm
#7

Quote from: Ajax2thousand20 on November 14, 2014, 07:37:01 PMMy Dad claimed he was 6'1.5" when he was my age but I kinda doubt it since he's now 5'11". He was realistically 6'0"-6'0.5" and added an inch.

How tall is your mother, since you were predicted to be 6'4?

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Posted on Nov 14, 2014, 7:42 pm
#8

Quote from: Ajax2thousand20 on November 14, 2014, 07:37:01 PMMy Dad claimed he was 6'1.5" when he was my age but I kinda doubt it since he's now 5'11". He was realistically 6'0"-6'0.5" and added an inch.


How tall is your mother, since you were predicted to be 6'4?

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Posted on Nov 14, 2014, 11:12 pm
#9

If your sitting height is 94CM, then it makes sense that you'd have long limbs, meaning that you'd have a huge armspan, which is great for LL. Calic has a sitting height under 90CM and he went to 5'10.5 from 5'7 and still looked amazing afterwards, in large part due to his long arms.

With a 94CM sitting height, you could go up to 6'3 and still be within the common, natural range of proportions.

How long are your femurs relative to your torso. Watch yourself squatting from a side perspective in a mirror to get a sense of this.

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Posted on Nov 14, 2014, 11:12 pm
#10

If your sitting height is 94CM, then it makes sense that you'd have long limbs, meaning that you'd have a huge armspan, which is great for LL. Calic has a sitting height under 90CM and he went to 5'10.5 from 5'7 and still looked amazing afterwards, in large part due to his long arms.

With a 94CM sitting height, you could go up to 6'3 and still be within the common, natural range of proportions.

How long are your femurs relative to your torso. Watch yourself squatting from a side perspective in a mirror to get a sense of this.

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